EMF – OMFG!

Posted on November 14, 2013

EMF is not one of those abbreviations you commonly see in text messages, so don’t worry if you couldn’t decipher the title of this post.

It means Electromagnetic Fields, and it’s a thing.

But it’s another of those things that con artists have appropriated to separate you from your money. Yep, anything vaguely sciencey or technical is certain to baffle the rubes and have them reaching for their wallet (see one of my earlier sprays on this subject here).

The whole EMF protection industry (and there seems to be quite a decent sized one out there) plays on the fact that yes, there are EM fields out there – otherwise, no TV, radio, phones, air traffic control, TV remotes, wi-fi, bluetooth, microwave ovens, etc etc, but that they are nasty and can harm you, and therefore you need to be protected from our cruel modern world.

Before we get into the fun of looking at a couple of these hilarious sites, a couple of simple statements on EM fields.

• EM radiation can hurt you if the field intensity is high enough – for example, I wouldn’t put the cat in the microwave oven. Or stand too close to a high power phone cell antenna dish (that is, on the actual dish, not the mast).
• Nothing in our daily environment has been shown to be harmful in any way. The biggest controversy has been mobile phones, but even huge studies on their effects have been inconclusive. And by ‘inconclusive’ I don’t mean ‘well, there may or may not be a problem’, like it’s 50:50; rather, there is no significant evidence of ANY harm. There is also the issue of living close to power lines, and all the media that’s had, but again, no evidence for any physiological effect, although there are certainly some psychogenic illnesses associated with them.
• Perhaps the dominant EM issue for us is UV radiation from the sun, and we already have protection from that – ozone layers, creams, and just staying indoors.

Conspiracy theorists and nutters, start your search engines! I expect a tonne of comments telling me how blinded I am by the establishment and ‘Big Tech’, and the New World Order, which used EM fields to control the population, yada yada yada. Go for it. But you know what I’m going to say, right? Show me the evidence for your claims. Closely followed by “no, not a study from the Online University of Hicksville USA, but one from a reputable source”. You know the drill by now.

Now that you know the basics, let’s have some fun – let’s start with the nicely titled EMF Blues. This site is basically a vehicle for mom and pop McKusick to sell some ceramic doo-dads which mom has cooked up in her ceramics class. In fact they would make nice buttons or ear-rings if you’re a bit a of a hippy.

But instead, their buttons are actually ”Crystal Catalyst Resonators”. OOohh. I swoon at the technical talk. Go on, say it to me again. Crystal Catalyst Resonators. Back in a minute….

Ok, I’m back now. Yes, apparently, these devices:

..harmonize electromagnetic frequencies so they are no longer harmful to your body. This makes them powerful EMF Protection Devices AND Life Energy Enhancers. …The technology has a unique composition and structure which allows it to absorb and then rebroadcast harmful electromagnetic radiations in a cleaner form. These cleaner frequencies are beneficial to the body. Tests shows that Crystal Catalyst® Resonators increase the body’s strength and enhance whole brainwave functioning.

So, more for your money then. But surely they play havoc with mobile phone reception? They didn’t say, but I emailed them, and their response was:

The Cell Phone Tab will not interfere with cell phone reception. The Tab does not block or shield the frequencies but rather harmonizes them, therefore, the frequencies are still present and intact, and reception is not altered.

They pointed me to the relevant page, where I found I could buy the Cell Phone Tab for only $16.50. Just stick it to the back of my phone, and all will be well.

But how do they know they work? More on this later. But front and centre they have a wonderful testimonial from William in Quebec (I know, impressive, right?), who says:

I had my Crystal Catalyst® Bead muscle tested by my naturopath and he was impressed by how well it worked for so little cost. I am now buying Cell Phone Tabs and the Star 3 Hole. I now feel confident in buying more and recommending them to others.

With that sort of support, why wouldn’t you be convinced? If a naturopath is impressed, it must be the real deal. But Robyn from Kentucky really seals the deal:

Do you ever tell what these blue disks are composed of? Don’t know how, but they really do stop the icky vibes from coming out of the computer. I don’t feel them anymore. Thank you!

Icky vibes from the computer? I only get those when I read Andrew Bolt online.

The site admits that science doesn’t know how it works, but goes for the ‘argument from antiquity’ with this quote:

Egyptian Faience refers to a silicon based ceramic glaze which was produced in Egypt from 3500 B.C. until the first century A.D. The Ancient Egyptians believed Faience to be a magical substance that contained the powers of rebirth. Scarabs and talismans were thought to derive their powers from this quartz based Faience glaze.

Crystal Catalyst® Technology shares many properties of Faience. It too is a silicone based ceramic and is fired in a similar energy field as was used to produce Faience in Ancient Egypt.

Well, it’s old, it must work. But wait there’s more…you can also charge water with the device! Bullshit you say. No, really. Here’s the proof:

Charged Water is water that has been given a new structure and has more healing abilities because of it. Water can be charged by placing a Crystal Catalyst® Bead in or touching the outside of a pitcher of water. This water tastes sweeter and is more easily absorbed by the body. Plants watered with Crystal Catalyst® Water grow green and lush.

But how was this wonderful technology developed? What great lab took this from wish to reality? None other that the team at Biomagnetics Research Inc, established in  1983. Here’s the team. I’m sure there’s a PhD in there somewhere. Actually there isn’t. Ma and pa’s main qualifications are in dowsing – you know, using a stick to find things in the ground. That’s ma and pa on the right, with Billy-bob and Betty-Lou on the left.

Perhaps surprisingly, I found a ‘Testings’ page on their site – so kudos for recognising the need for it, even though it’s grammatically unsound. But what do we find? Apparently EMF meters (which are also a thing) can’t test their product! Have we heard that before? You know, the ‘your modern science can’t deal with this mystical phenomenon’ gambit. No, apparently the only way to test that their product works is with Applied Kinesiology, Kirlian Photography and Whole Brainwave Functioning.

And damn, if they didn’t actually provide proof! There’s an actual picture of ma lifting a bottle of water before and after activating the patented technology! Wow, you have to see this to believe it! But now I’m being facetious. They’ve actually also done independent testing, oh yes. Here it is:

A leading International Canadian Testing Laboratory for Clean Energy has confirmed that the resonators “are not electrical, magnetic, or radioactive, and they can not harm electrical appliances, or computer hardware or software”

Well, ok, I could have told you that and I’m not a Canadian Testing Laboratory. Any comment on whether they work??? How about this:

Doctors at the University of California at Santa Cruz used Kiniseology (muscle testing) to measure the strength of subjects before exposure to electromagnetic radiations. Subjects were then measured in an electromagnetic field using Crystal Catalyst Resonators and showed to be stronger than they were prior to the exposure.

So now we’re using a fraudulent therapy, to test a fraudulent product? Nice One. See my article on Applied Kinesiology here. Pure theatre and totally bogus. Same goes for Kirlian Photography – which is completely fake – here’s a nice discussion of it here. What else?

Farmers in Wisconsin had Dairy cows in Wisconsin were under stress from power line radiation. After placing Crystal Catalyst® Beads on their collars the cows produced more milk with increased butter fat and less bacteria.

And the cows looked cute too, with their beads and all. Actually I’m surprised those farmers had time to do this testing, what with all the aliens doing anal probing in the part of the country. Maybe the aliens relaxed the cows – that would be a far more plausible explanation.

As for the brain testing, they contend that:

Being electrical, the brain is severely affected by electronic pollution. That’s why you feel so “brain-dead” after spending hours on your computer or talking on your cell phone.

No, you feel brain-dead because you’re tired. They follow this up with some hokey charts which anyone could have knocked up. Of course, this data has been published somewhere right? And peer reviewed? Because if they’ve actually built one of these things it would turn science and physics on its head. It means we could travel to Mars without worrying about those pesky cosmic rays! No more sunburn! And if string theory is correct, these devices could be used to block gravity too! Must get me one.

And finally, visit the Testimonials page, for a real laugh, all written in the same style – here’s the first one:

Your Frequency Harmonizer Pendant makes my child less jumpy and the Crystal Catalyst Bead makes him sing all day. Thank you very much for such nice products…I’d like to buy more in the future.

Really? You want your kid to be singing all day? And why would you need to buy more? Do they wear out?

Anyway, enough fun – and they’re are not the only site – the internet is littered with them –  try this one for example, which is a shambles of a site. Some of the fun facts on this site include:

Microwave ovens heat the food by radiation, which “deranges” the
molecules of food and water so our bodies have trouble recognizing
and using them.

The hip area produces 80% of the body’s red blood cells.  This
function is especially vulnerable to EMF damage.

You shouldn’t use your cell phone in a car because the metal car
frame amplifies electromagnetic radiation and affects all passengers,
even those not using the cell phone.

A cell phone’s impulses can disable the brain’s barrier that shields
the brain from poisons in the blood.  And it happens after only 2 minutes
of cell phone use.

You get the idea. Gloom and doom, therefore, buy our pendant.

Same old scam. Same old pitch.

Please don’t fall for it – just have a laugh and enjoy the kooky con artists of the 21st century.

From the archives: SCENAR Challenge

Posted on November 23, 2011 Updated on December 5, 2011

Way back in March, I did a couple of pieces on the magical therapy known as SCENAR. You know, another of those amazing things which the Europeans/Ancients/Russians/Easterners invented, but about which we are blissfully ignorant . After my rant in this piece, I featured and excited response by someone going by the well-thought out pseudonym of ‘person’, who, in defending the treatment and attacking me, made every logical fallacy in the book.

In the end I concluded it was just SCENAR marketing types wanting to get even, but just in case, challenged my learned correspondent to contribute some real learnin’ to rationalbrain. I suggested he/she:

1. Show me the ‘real research’ which demonstrates efficacy. I mean real studies, not ‘I’ve treated 47 people and they’re all happy’. Preferably the studies should have been published in a relevant and reputable peer-reviewed journal.
2. Explain to me why the Therapeutic Goods Administration has censured purveyors of scenar for misleading claims, which sound not unlike yours. And I don’t want to hear about how ‘big Pharma’ is trying to suppress this magical treatment.
3. Explain to me and the readers your understanding of the way scenar works. What is the mechanism of action, in terms of what we know about physiology, and without reference to mysticism, energy fields or quantum babble.
4. Please provide your qualifications, the institution from which you received them, what (if any) your specialties are, and what (if anything) you’ve published by way of research.

Well, I’m sure you’ll be surprised to hear that I didn’t receive a response. And after all that outrage.

So, I’m putting the challenge out to all SCENAR practitioners. I’m sure there must be at least one of you willing to enlighten us all by answering some or all of the above.

I sure hope the WordPress servers don’t melt down as the responses come in on this one.

Crystals of bullshit

Posted on November 21, 2011 Updated on November 23, 2011

While sitting in the waiting room for a physio appointment a couple of weeks ago, I absent-mindedly picked up some of the reading material which happened to be on a nearby table. Usually it’s years-old ‘women’s weekly’, or ‘yachting digest’, or whatever the practitioner’s hobby may be, enabling him/her to write off their favourite golfing magazine as a tax deduction I guess.

However on this occasion I picked up wonderful little rag called Nova, which apparently is ‘Australia’s Holstic Journal’ since 1994. But you knew that, right? It’s sub-title is ‘keeping mind and body together’. Of course my interest was piqued, after all, it had been days since I last had a good giggle.

Well, I don’t need to tell you what a hoot this magazine is, with every new page just dripping with a delicate blend of pseudoscience and marketing spin and designed specifically to part suckers from their hard-earned cash.

Read the rest of this entry »

Homeopathy and Round-up

Posted on August 25, 2011 Updated on August 26, 2011

I don’t know why the blogosphere wastes so much time and effort on discussing homeopathy. The jury’s back, and homeopathy has been found guilty of being crap.

However, the subject is like onion-weed which keeps popping up in the fairway of common sense, on the golf course of life. (Can you tell my annual golf trip is coming up?)

You just have to keep spraying.

This time, with his finger on the spray trigger, it’s Orac, with a terrific little piece (well, ‘little’  by Oracian standards), discussing a recent article he found trying to defend homeopathy yet again. In demolishing the article, he also provides a nice summary of the history and key claims of proponents.

The article he reviews actually takes the tack of criticising western medicine (I take ‘western medicine’ to mean ‘medicine that works’) for something they call ‘plausibility bias’, and making the point that requesting plausibility is somehow an unfair requirement. In other words, the bar is set too high. See one of my earlier posts on Bayesian analysis, which discusses how prior probability (aka plausibility) is relevant to assessing claims.

To help lower the bar, the article which Orac analyses proposes ‘pragmatic’ clinical trials – in other words, trials freed from those tiresome constraints of blinding and controls. Orac goes on to make the point that:

As I and others have pointed out before, “pragmatic” trials represent an inappropriate methodology to determine if a therapy works, because they are not blinded, often not well controlled, and therefore subject to all the biases to which less rigorous clinical trials are subject. Rather, the purpose of pragmatic trials is to test a therapy in “real world” conditions after it’s been demonstrated to be safe and efficacious in proper randomized clinical trials in order to see how much its efficacy and safety decline away from the ivory tower environment under which many clinical trials are run. Even then, there are lots of problems with pragmatic trials due to their less rigorous nature. In any case, using pragmatic trials to test efficacy is a blatant attempt to lower the standard of evidence

I think that says it all, and elegantly.

I’m ready to tee off now, but well aware that the weeds will be back.

Debating the dark side

Posted on April 29, 2011 Updated on April 29, 2011

The war against the ‘dark side’ – by this I mean pseudo-science and quackery in general – continues unabated. In fact, pseudo-science is said to be an ‘unsinkable rubber duck’.

No sooner have we seen the back of Oprah (and those of you who read my earlier posts regarding Oprah, and in particular her contribution to the promotion of pseudo-science and quackery, will understand my upbeat tone here), but one of her proteges takes the baton.

One of her occasional guests was one Dr. Mehmet Oz, who is a real physician as they call them over there. As I understand it, he was initially just giving general health advice, but as his notoriety grew, he increasingly moved towards the dark side. Now he has a very successful spin-off show, which is just choc-a-bloc with pseudo-science and nonsense in general.

Our Dr. Oz seems to have embraced EVERY known form of unscientific mumbo-jumbo he can get his hands on, including faith healing. Suffice to say he is on the loony fringe in this regard, and one wonders how he could actually believe what he is saying, given the studies which he apparently did in university.

Well, this past week Dr. Oz invited one of the luminaries of the skeptic movement, Dr. Steve Novella, to speak on the program.  Before the show, the blogosphere was abuzz with anticipation, and it was somewhat pessimistic regarding Steve’s chances of getting the message across, given the past history of debating people who argue from a position based on belief rather than evidence. Not only that, such people generally stack the audience and structure of the session with accolytes, as well as perform some judicious editing before the show goes to air. I’ve written about this sort of thing before – see this post for instance, and in particular the bit on Harriet Hall, who was subject to this treatment while actually being a paid employee of Oprah. See also my earlier post on debating the irrational.

The upshot is that Steve actually got a chance to make his points, albeit in a very constrained structure, but with Dr. Oz always having the final word. It’s worth a look: here are the links to the video.

• Part 1
• Part 2
• Part 3

Let me know what you think. In my opinion, Steve did as well as could be expected, given the circumstances – especially given the fact that Dr. Oz had surrounded himself with a bunch of ‘yes-men’. Notice in particular the smarmy expression on the woman next to Steve. Notice also the typical tactics employed when trying to justify modalities for which there is no real evidence -references to ‘millions of people’ and ‘thousands of years’, and general put-downs of anything ‘western’.

You can read Steve’s own account of the experience here.